Hi guys i apologize for not posting any earlier but i have been suffering with the disease of addiction for the past couple of years. When i started to write this blog i was heavily addicted to stimulants, (Ritalin, cocaine and amphetamines) but today i have 73 days clean from everything. The addiction to stimulants eventually progressed into an opiate limbo and i have been stuck for the past 2 years. Heroin was my eventual downfall but, i have recovered and am standing tall. I had written some poems this time around that i will publish on this site. Some relate to my using career ,and some are just simple randomness :)

  So I have recently started using this site for dating because to be honest I suck with talking to females, I really do. To me it is like I am attempting to solve a mathematical algorithm, blindfolded and drunk, but still I attempt to persevere. So I met this girl online , I think I like this girl or at least I'm genuinely attracted. I don't think she likes me but i guess that takes time to develop.Talking to females has been the hardest thing clean, I really feel like popping a XANAX and taking the edge off but i need to learn how to do this clean. I feel like a virgin on an expedition through the gates of hell. I just hope all goes well and she sees that i am a great person, i think i am i don't want to be too narcissistic and say that im amazing but i know im a good guy.

   Heres a poem off top of my head:
The stream is flowing through me 
I'm left with the world to face
I promise i won't use thee 
maybe i will have a taste 
before i know it i'm in love with the poison 
rehab put me in my place 
i am sane again to see 
I'm left with the world to face